Kahmunrah's new plot/Oh, my Mysterious Lady
(Later at the ship, after King Gator has disappeared in the forest, Kahmunrah is in his headquarters, sitting in a chair, covered in a blanket, his bare feet in a tub of warm water, and an ice bag tied on his head. He sniffed a bit as if he has a cold due to being in the cold water in Skull Rock and he is also angry to the fact that Link humiliated him) Kahmunrah: That cursed Link Pan! (Groans) Making a fool out of me! (His nose tickled suddenly and he sneezed that his head went flying right into the back rest of the chair and bumped into it) Kahmunrah: (Groaning in pain) My head.... (He sighs wearily) Kahmunrah: (Wearily) How much worse can it get? (Suddenly, as if he got an answer, he heard hammering from outside on the door. Outside the headquarters, Puppetmon is hammering a sign that says “Quiet! Do not disturb!” on it, with Randall holding the last nail for Puppetmon to hammer it.) Randall: I betcha the captain will get irritated by the hammering, Puppetmon. Puppetmon: I know, but I have to make sure he gets some peace and quiet. (Then, after Randall hands Puppetmon the last nail and the puppet-type Digimon starts hammering it in, Scales comes up with a kettle of hot water) Scales: (Singing) Oh, a pirate’s life Is a wonderful life.... (He hands the kettle to Randall) Scales: Here’s the hot water, guys. (Puppetmon shushed Scales) Puppetmon: Quiet! The captain’s got a splitting headache! We mustn’t annoy him. (Scales nods) Scales: I understand, but that doesn’t change the fact that he failed to kill Link Pan. (He walks away. Then, Kahmunrah, still wrapped in a blanket and wearing an ice bag, opened the door to scold them into being quiet when Puppetmon, who doesn’t notice, swung his hammer at the door and accidentally banged Kahmunrah in the head with it, making him vibrate a little. Then Kahmunrah dizzily danced around until he plopped down into the chair with one foot in the tub, still dizzy. Then, Randall and Puppetmon went into the captain’s headquarters cautiously with the kettle. Puppetmon, being the last to enter, tripped on his foot and nearly falls on Randall, but recovered. As the two looked at Kahmunrah closely, they notice he is now smiling dizzily, and they think it’s real) Puppetmon: Wow, Captain. It’s nice to see you smiling again. (He puts Kahmunrah’s other foot in the tub) Puppetmon: Brings back the good old days when we were living a healthy, normal life, scuttling ships, cutting throats, pillaging and plundering. Why don’t we go back to sea again? (After Puppetmon placed a thermometer in Kahmunrah’s mouth, he chimed in while he took the kettle from Randall and started pouring the hot water into the tub) Puppetmon: Well, come to think of it, there’s trouble brewing on the island. Women trouble that is. Randall: (Confused) Women trouble? (Realizes) Oh yeah. We don’t want this rumor to go on, but King Candy told us that Goobot and Ooblar told him that he heard that Link Pan has banished Yuffie Kisaragi. Puppetmon: That’s right. (While they explained this, the hot water made the thermometer turn red and when it popped due to high heat from the water, Kahmunrah snapped out of his dizziness and jumped out of the water, screaming in pain and knocking Puppetmon back. As he recovered, Kahmunrah grabbed him to yell at him at first) Kahmunrah: Why, you imbecile! I ought to...! (He calmed down suddenly and removed the ice bag off his head while putting Puppetmon down) Kahmunrah: Wait. Did you say Link banished Yuffie? Puppetmon: Well, yeah. They did. Kahmunrah: Why did he? Puppetmon: It was because of those two girls named Rika and Zelda, Captain. Randall: That’s right. And Yuffie got jealous of them spending time together with the boy that she tried to kill those two girls. Puppetmon: But what happened next? We’ll tell you what happens next. Link rescued the girls before they were killed. Randall: And that is why Yuffie was banished in the first place. Kahmunrah: Wow, which girl is Link hanging out with? Randall: According to Goobot and Ooblar, Zelda is hanging out with Link. Kahmunrah: So Rika is.... Randall: Same, but Zelda mostly. (Kahmunrah, upon hearing this, smiled evilly and started thinking of a plan) Kahmunrah: Well, well.... Puppetmon: That’s why we have to leave, Captain. This is not a place for a respectable pirate like you. (With a new plan in motion already, Kahmunrah got excited) Kahmunrah: That’s it, guys! That’s it! (He slaps Puppetmon and Randall down on the ground like they were dominoes) Randall and Puppetmon: Ouch! (They soon think Kahmunrah is finally agreeing to leave Neverland) Randall: Thank goodness you agree, Captain! (Kahmunrah then throws the blanket off to reveal his other pair of clothes, which were the same ones from before) Kahmunrah: Get my hat! Right now! Puppetmon: Yes, sir! The sooner we get going, the better! Kahmunrah: Indeed! A jealous female can be tricked into anything like this. (Puppetmon hands Kahmunrah another hat and after he puts it on, Kahmunrah was about to leave when Puppetmon responded to what the captain just said) Puppetmon: “Jealous female?” (Kahmunrah turned to them) Kahmunrah: Yes, obviously! If we impress that little ninja fairy, convince her we’re eager to help her, the wench may chart our course to a (Winks his eye) certain hideout. Puppetmon: (Confused) Certain...? (Realizes) Oh yeah! Kahmunrah: You know what hideout I’m talking about, right? Puppetmon: Yeah! The Spanish Main! (After a short pause, Kahmunrah slaps his palm on his face in annoyance and got angry) Kahmunrah: No! Link Pan’s hideout! Randall: (Confused) I thought we were leaving the island, Captain? Kahmunrah: Not yet. Right now, we are going to find Yuffie and convince her to tell us where the hideout is. (Randall and Puppetmon realized) Puppetmon and Randall: Oh.... Randall: But where will we find her? Kahmunrah: We’ll scour the Haunted Forest first. Puppetmon: But isn’t that where King Gator lives? Kahmunrah: I know. But just as long as he doesn’t notice us. (He changes the subject) Kahmunrah: Anyway, let’s gather volunteers and go now. (They leave to go gather some volunteers. Meanwhile, at the Monster village, Link’s group, Mavis, and Johnny realized what happened with the other group from a guilty Dracula after revealing that Mavis and Johnny were captured by Kahmunrah and was already rescued) Link: So they must have gotten lost. Dracula: Indeed. If I known that it was Kahmunrah who did this, I wouldn’t have been so hard on your friends. Link: Me, Batty, Jiji, and the girls will do whatever it takes to find them without flying and get them back here. Dracula: I agree. And tell them we’ll treat them with hospitality in an apologetic way. Mavis: And Johnny and I shall go with them. Dracula: (Surprised) You? Mavis? Are you sure you want to? You and Johnny were just rescued and returned. I don’t want you to get hurt. Mavis: I’ll be fine. Link, as well as Batty, these girls and the cat, will be with me. Johnny: And besides, we want to be there to show their friends that we’re alright. And we can be their navigator through the forest. (Realizing they’re right, Dracula gave in) Dracula: Very well. All of you, be safe. May the spirits guide you safely. Link’s group: We will. (With that, Link’s group, including Mavis and Johnny, went into the Haunted Forest. In the Haunted Forest, Cody’s group are still searching for the cliff edge) Gene: (Tired) How much longer do we have to walk through this?! Cody: I don’t know. I am worried. It’s almost sunset. (Suddenly, they heard rustling in the bushes) Ash: Is it a monster? Nemo: Is it King Gator? May: (Bravely) Who’s there?! (Suddenly, Link’s group and Mavis and Johnny emerged, much to the other group’s relief) May: (Happy to see them) Guys! (Even the groups were happy to see each other that they hugged. Upon noticing Mavis and Johnny, Cody’s group got confused) Gene: You saved Jonathan and Mavis? Link: Yes. Max: So that’s Mavis and Jonathan, huh? Mavis: We really do need to explain what happened. Dewey: You darn right you do! Huey: Dewey! (Dewey catches himself) Dewey: Sorry. (Later, as they headed to the Monster encampment, everything was explained) May: Well, that’s a relief. Ash: At least the count realizes now. Batty: Indeed. Nemo: Do you think we’ll have a party there? Ash: Yeah. And think of the delicious food. Kiki: Yum! (Suddenly, they heard rustling from a distance) Kiki: What was that? (Link shushes them and while they hid, they peeked and saw Kahmunrah, Puppetmon, and Randall, along with their volunteers, emerge from the bushes. The volunteers were Bowser, Scales, Stayne, King Candy, Kip, Biederman, Ooblar, and Pete. Link’s group glared at them) Link: (Whispering) It’s the old dress wearer again! May: (Whispering) And his crew! Ash: (Whispering) I say we pay them back for what they put us through! Louie: (Whispering) I agree. We’ll just fool them around, humane-like or otherwise. Rika: (Whispering) Are you sure we can do that? Link: (Whispering) Well.... Since Louie said humane-like or otherwise.... (He ponders a bit and then agreed) Link: (Whispering) Okay. Zelda: (Whispering) But what will we fool them around on? Link: (Whispering) Why don’t we...? (They huddle up and whisper their plan. With Kahmunrah’s group, they searched everywhere for Yuffie, but she was nowhere to be seen) Biederman: How long do we have to be here? Stayne: Biederman has a point! How long do we have to stay...? Kahmunrah: Quiet! Do you just wanna quit?! We are not gonna go back to the ship until the cows have come home! (A short pause) Puppetmon: And when will the cows be found? Kahmunrah: Oh brother.... (Shouts) I don’t mean cows! (Suddenly, they heard a ghostly laugh, scaring the sissy members of the crew) King Candy: (Terrified) What in the world is that? Scales: I got a feeling we're being followed. (Then, another ghostly laugh emerged from the bushes. Unaware to them, Batty was the one making the ghostly laugh. He then turned to Link and May) Batty: (Quietly mouthing) Now! (Link then speaks up in a deep voice) Link: (In deep voice) Who dares to awaken me, King Gator?! (The sissy members of the crew shook in fear while the serious members, including Kahmunrah, looked suspicious) Puppetmon: (In a panicked voice) I knew it! King Gator is going to eat us! Kahmunrah: Shut up! (To Pete) Go check out the source of the voice! Pete: Aye-aye, Captain. (Pete took a step closer and backed away a bit upon hearing Link make a huge roar. Kahmunrah, still suspicious, walked up to Pete along with Bowser) Kahmunrah: Let’s try talking to, quote, King Gator, unquote. It might be just a spirit. (The crew nods in agreement. Link and his friends nod in agreement on their new tactic. Kahmunrah then turns to the source of the voice) Kahmunrah: Spirit that haunts this dark forest tonight. Dost hear us? Link: (In a spooky voice) Odds, bongs, hammer, and tongs, I hear you. Kahmunrah: Then speak! Who are you really? Link: (In a spooky voice) I am Kahmunrah, Captain of the Moron Pirate Crew. Kahmunrah: No you’re not, you imposter! Link: (In a spooky voice) Stow that gab, or I shall hook you with my hook, or better, cast anchor in you! (Kahmunrah then tried a different tactic) Kahmunrah: Then if you are Kahmunrah, what am I then? (Link stifled a quiet laugh and spoke in his spooky voice) Link: (In a spooky voice) You are a dress wearer! A stinky dress wearer! (The crew got confused while Puppetmon fell for it) Puppetmon: Have we been captained all this time by a dress wearer? (He turns to Kahmunrah defiantly) Puppetmon: If that’s true, fake captain, that’s lowering to our pride! Kahmunrah: That voice is saying this as a bunch of lies! (Realizing, Puppetmon drooped in embarrassment) Puppetmon: Sorry, Captain. (Kahmunrah turned to Bowser and Pete and motioned them to talk) Bowser: Okay, spirit. Do you have another name? Link: (In a spooky voice) Yes. King Candy: Vegetable? Link: (In a spooky voice) No. Ooblar: Mineral? Crew: (Aghast at Ooblar’s guess) Mineral?! Link: (In a spooky voice) No. Randall: Animal? Link: (In a spooky voice) Yes. (Pete then started the questioning) Pete: Are you actually a, dare I say, a woman? (Link cues May, dressed in a cloaked disguise, to speak up) May: Yes! (Pete and Bowser winks at the crew while they rolled their eyes, for they knew Pete and even Bowser is a sucker for women) Bowser: Do you have a beautiful voice? May: Yes! (She comes out in her disguise and starts vocalizing. Bowser and Pete became love-struck, as if they were seduced) Pete: It is a lady! (May vocalizes some more until her held note made the crew, except the love-struck Bowser and Pete, cover their ears) Kip: Too loud! Pete: She’s a beautiful one, too! (They start chasing May, only for her to scamper away into another bush) Bowser: (Singing) Oh, my mysterious lady What is your name? (He and Pete peeks in the other bush, but May is gone already) Pete: (Singing) Oh, my mysterious lady From whence have you came? (May peeks out of another bush and uses her index finger to seductively usher Pete and Bowser to come to her) May: (Singing) La la la la La la la la la la (Pete and Bowser moves to May slowly but the girl ducked under the bush) Pete: (Singing) Answer my plea Who may ye be? (He clears the bush, but May’s gone again. Suddenly, May comes up from behind and kicks Pete’s butt literally) Pete: Doof! (May sings some notes. Then as Pete turned around to see behind him, she snuck behind him and threw him over towards Bowser and she then sang some notes again. As she continued the note singing, Pete, who recovered with Bowser, almost grabs her cloak, but she shrieked and ran off with Bowser and Pete pursuing her still. Kahmunrah’s crew and Link’s group went after them) Bowser: (Singing) Oh, my mysterious lady What is your name? (As he sang the next part, Bowser and Pete noticed a piece of clothed moss, thinking it's May’s cloak, and began pulling on it) Bowser and Pete: (Singing) Take off that veil And let me see your face Why hide your beauty Beneath that tender lace? (As he repeated this line three times, only a little faster, Pete and Bowser continued pulling, as May, who is watching him from on top of a tree branch, sang some notes) Bowser and Pete: (Singing) Take off that veil And let me see your face Why hide your beauty Beneath that tender lace? Take off that veil And let me see your face Why hide your beauty Beneath that tender lace? (After singing this line, Pete and Bowser finally got to the end and saw it was actually moss) Bowser: Yech! (They then noticed May on the tree branch and began to get love-struck even more, with May not noticing) Bowser: (Singing) What’s your secret? May: (Singing) La-la-la-la-la-la Pete: (Singing) Tell your secret May: (Singing) La-la-la-la-la-la Pete and Bowser: (Singing) Speak, oh, speak, oh, speak, I pray thee Tell me, oh, tell me, Your name (May then starts singing in a series of cadenzas. As she slowly climbs down the tree, not noticing Bowser and Pete are still watching, a piece of the cloak suddenly got caught by another branch and it slowly slips off of May, revealing her to Bowser and Pete, who suddenly became shocked and surprised. Even Kahmunrah and the crew noticed. Link and his friends saw all of this and motioned May to stop. After May finished singing, Kahmunrah turned to Bowser, Pete, and the crew) Kahmunrah: (Whispering) It’s Link Pan and his friends. (Bowser, Pete, and the crew, grinned evilly and started to slowly sneak up on May, Link, and the group as May began to conclude her singing. Link and the group, seeing this, ushered May to stop. As she slowly stopped and turned, Bowser is right in front of her and she screams. She runs and so does Link’s group. As she ran from Bowser, Pete, and Kip, May called out to the others) May: Max, guys, help! (Pikachu and Ash swung down on a vine like Tarzan, and scooped May into his arm and swung to safety, while kicking down the three pirates chasing her) May: Thank you! Ash: You're welcome! (Recovering, the three ran at the tree) Kip: You’re so gonna be sorry for this! (As Ash, Pikachu, and May jumped to another spot at the bottom of the tree safely and pushed the log onto the three pirates) Ash: (Jokingly) Looks like they should stop logging around! (They laugh and ran. The three chased after them, but got caught in a cage. With the others, Huey, Dewey, and Louie are running from King Candy, Scales, and Stayne) Huey: We need some backup here! Dewey: And hurry! Stayne: Stand still and we’ll back you! Scales: Hold still! King Candy: Have some candy! (He fires his taffy gun, but missed) King Candy: Come here, you little duckies! So I may feed you some mud! (Then, Rika, answering Nemo’s cue, threw some mud at them) Rika: You wanted mud? Well, here’s mud in your face! (After recovering, the three pirates were then pushed into the same cage, but unfortunately, the impact broke the cage. Suddenly, Zelda threw some more mud at the other pirates, who were about to sneak attack Link) Zelda: Take that, you scurvy scums! (Recovering, Ooblar threw some mud at Zelda) Ooblar: Why don’t you take these! (Zelda dodged until she was cornered by rocks. Just when Ooblar was about to throw a knife at her, Link knocked him aside) Kahmunrah: Get them! (Link’s group ran, with Kahmunrah’s crew in hot pursuit through the forest until they reached the cliff edge) Ash: What do you know? The cliff edge. Pikachu: Pika. Kahmunrah: But there’s no escape. (They turned and saw Kahmunrah and the crew coming closer. Link pulled his sword out, when suddenly, they heard ticking) Kahmunrah: Uh-oh. (With that distraction, Link’s group then ran to return to the Monster encampment while the pirates retreated back to the ship. After returning to the ship, the other pirates laughed at Kahmunrah and the volunteers) Goobot: (Laughing) That’s what happened? Humiliated again?! Dr. Facilier: (Laughing) Yes, it’s more funnier than a barrel full of monkeys! (Then, Swackhammer returned to his quarters to get cleaned up while the other crew members angrily went to clean themselves up too) Kip: Those brats will pay for what they did to us! Biederman: My sentiments exactly. I mean, humiliated? Ha! I’ve seen better days, but...! Stayne: Well, let’s just hope that ninja fairy is found another way. King Candy: I thought you knew her name is Yuffie? Stayne: I do know her name! (Back in the captain’s headquarters, Kahmunrah, now cleaned up, placed his gold hook on his left arm in place of his usual silver hook while talking with Puppetmon and Randall, who’re also cleaned up) Kahmunrah: Alright, these humiliations have gone too far! You two go look for Yuffie! Puppetmon and Randall: Aye-aye, sir! (With that, Puppetmon and Randall quickly went into the rowboat, and quickly paddled back to the island to find Yuffie) ‘Coming up: Link’s team and the Monsters celebrate the festivities and during the party, Jiji and the girls become homesick while Zelda gets jealous of Link giving Mavis the attention. Also, Kahmunrah is gonna make Yuffie do something horrible that will make Yuffie feel bad for it.’ Category:Fan Fiction